 
           
             
           
            Adult-Children of alcoholics & other narcissists
 
            1. I acknowledge something terrible happened 
     - I know it’s not my imagination
  2. I’m aware on some level that something   
      was done to me - I was a victim of sexual   
      abuse / incest when I was a child
  3.  I recognize I’m a true survivor, having 
       chosen life over suicide
  4. I recognize & begin to change thoughts  of
      being ‘contaminated’ & ‘damaged goods’
  5. I feel angry about being used & abused
  6. I feel rage at my non-protecting parent(s)     
      (often the mother)
  7. I discuss the abuse honestly with therapists 
     & other healers & groups 
  8. I tell a non-family member about the abuse
  9. I tell a family member who didn’t know         
      previously
 10. I slowly re-experience & deal with emotions   
      suited to each incident of abuse
 11. I begin giving up my belief that I was    
      responsible for the abuse occurring 
 12. I’m recognizing that, at the time of the
      abuse, my actions & reactions were  
      appropriate to the situation - it was the 
      abuser who was not acting appropriately!
 13. I’m slowly understanding how the past   
     molestation has effected my current 
     relationships & patterns of behavior
 14. I’m able to lower my resistance to talking
     about the abuse with others, without all
the details
SEXUAL ABUSE
 
             15. I’m dealing with residual guilt if I got  
    physical pleasure from the any part of the  
    molestation, and I’m coming to accept the 
    fact that the human body has natural 
    responses to being touched, regardless 
    of the source.
 16. If I perceived any aspect of the abuse 
    as positive (like having special status in 
    the family),  I’m beginning to understand    
    & accept those childhood feelings
 17. I see the connection between the abuse & 
    my current relationships, & am developing  
    some control over recreating to those hooks
 18. I recognize I have a choice to confront my 
    perpetrator(s) - or not
 19. I’m beginning to see what I want from  
     relationships now, whether sexual or not
 20. I can to enjoy different forms of intimacy
 21. I’m developing a sense of self and my 
     self-esteem is increasing
 22. I’m becoming more at ease with the topic 
     of my abuse & that of others I hear about
 23. I know that I can chose to forgive my 
     perpetrator - or not
 24. I’m in touch with my old rage which         
     used to negatively effect all my 
     experiences & feelings but it’s no longer 
a constant companion, which is a relief
 
           
           
             
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